Lubaina gave up and I
gave in, and so I lay this place into an internet-ey grave.
But, more on that later.
Friends and
not-friends, we've come a long way and there are a lot of places we
can look at last year from.
\We're a fifth of the
way through.
\\We're past first
year.
\\\We're no longer the
junior batch so we can rag people now. Yayy!!!
I prefer to think of it
as a learning experience, much like this little venture.
See, we know we learned something when the way we used to see the world no longer holds true.
That happens almost everyday when you're a med-school student,
especially a mediocre one who believes that the next PBL would
actually have more than 2 hours of preparation behind it but then you
learn that you can barely put a single hour there despite the gallon
of coffee burning your nerves off and boom! New worldview.
I still remember how
the prof prep went. I thought I could get some sleep the day before
the actual test but my night was haunted by flashes from the entire
year.
I remembered the days
of the great decline, the era of the lakeside and the rise and fall
of Age of Empires. There was the devolution from diurnal-ity and the
many hours wasted battling bureaucracy. There was happiness, there
was sorrow and there was so much loss.
Because, Sami left, you
know. That was pretty damn sad.
But, anyways, I remember
how the prep went. I spent two weeks going through all the books and
all the notes (not mine) I could get my hands on and then I learned
that the prof had 75% of its questions repeated. If I had just done
my totes I could have done so much better. So, I go and exclusively
learn totes for the next paper and I do pretty good on it.
I learned so much that
day, mainly that I was barking up the wrong tree for the whole year.
The days after were
laced with disillusionment. What's the point of learning anyways if
marks come from another source entirely?
But, learning is not
just something academical.
I learned many things
that do not mean a lot to most people, but made a world of difference
to me.
Life takes a lot of
energy to live effectively. What that means is that if you plan to go
to the gym and study for your next PBL and do your laundry and clean
your room on the same day; you're fricking high. All that you're
actually gonna accomplish is that you'll toss clothes off of your bed, on to your floor, go to sleep and then cram the entire
PBL in 30 minutes and almost get a U.
In short, you can never
do everything you plan to do.
I came here with a lot
of plans, even hatched a few when I came here. I was only able to
accomplish, like, a third of them. Couldn't even do them that well.
Which brings me back to
the start. Why didn't this idea work?
\I could think of some
reasons from the top of my head (No-one really cared about this).
\\I could go around and
ask people and get some more (People were so busy the entire year and
it was forgotten fairly early on).
\\\Then I could
ruminate over it and get another few right there (We never put a lot
of fervor into this project anyways; assuming that submissions would
come by eventually was probably not the best way to do this and the
idea was fundamentally flawed) so there's really no point answering
that question.
But I thought it would
and it didn't. That's a learning experience right there.
Just like the time
Lubaina said that the only people who would post here are me and
herself, so iss puri cheez ko miss karao.
Well, okay. Fine. Kara
detay hain miss. It's not like I was sitting on a windfall of things
to write anyways. And, it makes perfect sense
I'm looking at the post
I started this with and the enthusiasm is somewhat sickening and full of naivete. I assumed to high heck but all we have to show for
our sense of batch-hood is an overflow of absolute crap (aku
cunfeshunz pls).
I couldn't rest without
giving this place a proper burial and so here we are. I guess we
don't need a publication to keep these years alive in the distant
future. Facebook selfie-albums and statuses and all the posts here
and on whatsapp and wherever will have to suffice.
Sigh.
A happy new year to all
of you and may you never run out of the will to do stuff because god
forbid we end up with more failed endeavors.